dropping rocks

life's road has never been easy. stumbling blocks have always been there. sometimes, they manifest themselves through problems in school, in friends, family. sometimes, they manifest themselves through ourselves. sometimes, we become the problem. or at least we think we do. and in the extreme occasion that this happens, when we blame ourselves for the fuck ups in our lives, there is nothing more therapeutic than to share it with friends. to unload the burden to people around us so as to diffuse the feeling of inaptness and thereby in the process heal ourselves and become this new strong person.

corollary to this however is the premise of the existence of friends. the fact that the road of life is laden with stumbling blocks doesn't mean that we cannot find some precious stones once in a while. when we see them, we pick them up, treasure them, and then ask/lend a helping hand or a listening ear if and when life weighs down on us/them, if and when then all we/they can think of is how fucked up our lives are and how we/they are responsible for such mess.

but, in very rare occasions, we sometimes discover how these precious friends that we seemed to have treasured and cared for are nothing but unappreciative and backbiting. we discover that no matter how we reach for them, they will never really reach back. they will never really reciprocate if and when it is you who will need their help. instead, they say good things in front of you but attack you treacherously from behind. and then we realize, it is during this time that we decide it's time to drop their stones.

just as i am dropping his right now.

goodbye old friend.